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08 August 2004 @ 02:14 am
actual fic and photos this time.  
Okay, now for the promised content. :)


Title: Out of the Closet
Rating: PG
Pairings: None
Category: Humor
Warnings: Short, silly, pointless.
Older brother: Fifteen
Younger brother: Fourteen


Havoc shifted himself carefully in his chair, bracing his boots against the desk and tilting it back on two legs. Leaning over, he shoved open the window and then settled back into his seat, pulling a cigarette from his pocket with a satisfied sigh.

The click of the lighter carried across the office, and Breda looked up from his own work. "Hey, Havoc," he said. "You'd better not let Hawkeye catch you smoking that in the office, or she'll have a fit."

"I've got the window open," Havoc objected, "so the only way she'll find out is if you tell her." He flicked the lighter closed, and slipped in into his pocket.

"Yeah, right." Breda turned his chair around, and leaned over his desk towards Havoc's. "She's got a nose like a bloodhound, you know, and there's this look she always gets when there's something she disapproves of, I swear --"

Havoc took a pull on his cigarette, reasoning that even if Hawkeye were to burst in at this moment, he would get a few lungfuls of smoke first. "You're imagining things," he said loftily. "Lieutenant Hawkeye always has that look."

"Maybe when she's looking at you," Breda grinned at him. "Havoc, have you thought that maybe those smoke-sticks you carry around are the reason you can't get a girl to look at you twice?"

"Hey!" Havoc snapped, and his chair thumped forwards onto the floor. "I can get any girl I want to look at me twice, I just don't happen to want any girl. I have some taste, unlike --"

A knock resounded through the room, cutting off the conversation, and Havoc cursed softly as he fumbled his cigarette away from his lips and out of sight. It was the outer door that opened, though, not Hawkeye from the inner door, and it was only the Fullmetal Alchemist who opened it.

"Edward?" Surprised, Havoc managed a salute. Ed waved him down, though, before he could start to get up. "Oh, good morning. Al not with you today?"

"Hello, Edward," Breda echoed. "What are you doing here at this time of day? I thought you were between assignments."

"Morning, Breda," Ed seemed in a surprisingly cheerful mood, or he wouldn't have bothered responding. "Havoc. Al's still in the library. I am on down time right now, though that's between me and the Jerk. Speaking of which, is he in right now?"

"Uh, he should be." Havoc glanced at Breda for confirmation, who shrugged. "I don't know if he's taking appointments though, ask Hawkeye."

"That's okay." Ed snickered. "I don't want to talk to him for very long, I just want to see him face-to-face."

That made no particular sense to Havoc, so he only shrugged again. "Well, go on in, then," he said.

"Sure." Ed took off across the office; Havoc reached for his paper. As Ed passed his desk, though, he could have sworn he heard the Fullmetal Alchemist mutter, under his breath, "Damn, how do they walk in these --"

Havoc frowned, and looked up again. He could have sworn there was something odd about the way Edward was walking today -- as though he was constantly in danger of losing his balance. Ed wouldn't come into the office drunk, would he? No, wait, he was only fifteen --

He frowned again, and looked across the space to meet Breda's puzzled eyes.



Hawkeye looked at the clock on the wall again, and then at the half-open door to the Colonel's office. Roy Mustang had precisely seven and a half minutes to finish his coffee, before it was time for Hawkeye to come in and brace him into doing his paperwork. She scowled down at her stack of papers that all needed signing off; was it all men who needed to be prodded into taking responsibility, or just this one?

She almost missed Edward's entry into the room; he didn't stop, but just kept going in towards the Colonel's office. "Hey, Lieutenant," he greeted her in passing, and made for the door.

Startled, she dropped the stack of paperwork. "Ah, Edward --" she said. "I don't think the Colonel is --"

She stopped, and looked at the half-open door. From what she could see, Mustang was folding papers into origami figures. She sighed. "Go right in, Fullmetal," she said.

"Thanks," Ed said. "This won't take long." He sounded positively gleeful about something, and as he passed, he smiled down at her.

Wait a minute. Smiled down at her? Even when sitting, Hawkeye was still taller than Edward.

An alarm began to go off in her head, and she pushed her chair back from her desk and stood, just in time to see Edward disappear into the inner office. Suddenly worried for the continued health of her fellow officers and the structural integrity of the office, she followed.




The noise Lieutenant Hawkeye made then was not exactly a shriek, but it wasn't exactly a word, either. Still, it was quite enough to bring Havoc and Breda, followed shortly by Fury from outside, tumbling into the office. They nearly ran headlong into Hawkeye, standing frozen in the doorway, and a few moments of muttering, cursing, and elbowing for positions ensued.

Finally, everyone had gotten sorted out, enough to get a clear view of Colonel Roy Mustang, a half-folded crane in his hands, blinking in a sleepy and puzzled manner up at Edward.

Up at Edward.

At Edward Elric, who, as he turned towards them, afforded them a very nice view of his new boots.

His glossy black, patent-leather, six-inch stiletto heel boots.

"Well?" Ed planted his hands on his hips, smirking. "What do you think of that?"



Hawkeye found her voice first, possibly because of having the most exposure. "Um, Edward," she sputtered, and started again. "Fullmetal -- you appear to be... er... wearing some rather non-regulation footwear."

Ed turned towards her with a sarcastic quirk of his eyebrows. "Since when do I wear that stupid uniform anyway?" he said.

"Edward," Fury half-whispered. "You do know that those are, uh, women's boots?"

"Mm-hmm!" Edward beamed as he nodded. "Impressive, aren't they?"

There was another moment when nobody knew quite what to say. Roy carefully set the half-finished crane on the desk, and leaned forward to get a good look at the boots. In addition to the monstrous heels, the ball of the shoe also had a several-inch platform, which explained the considerable boost to height. The leather was stamped with stars and flowers. "Fullmetal --" he started.

"Edward!" Havoc burst in. "Don't you think that wearing something those, to a military base of all places, is a little bit, well, weird?"

"Uh-huh," Edward nodded again. He was smiling, the same sort of smile he wore right before he turned roads into holes.

"Edward," Hawkeye put in kindly, "has it occurred to you that you and Alphonse may be spending too much time alone?"

Edward just snorted, and rolled his eyes. "Don't be ridiculous."

"Then why in God's name don't you even have the grace to look a little embarassed?" Breda shrieked, losing his cool entirely.

"Because," Edward said, voice full of suppressed glee. He swivelled around, very neatly managing to keep his legs from fouling up, and pointed across the desk at Roy. Roy had a half-alarmed, half-bemused look on his face, like a man not quite sure if this was caused by eating too many enchiladas before bed.

"Fullmetal," he said mildly, "we need to have a talk about exactly what regulations forbid taking clothes out of their superior officers' closets."


~fin~





If you aren't sick and tired of cosplay photos yet, I put all my Otakon photos up here. These are all sorts of costumes, not just FMA, but you can browse if you like.

I think this one is my favorite: An Envy cosplayer.

...no, for real this time. ^^; An Envy cosplayer. An Ed (there were so many Eds) carrying Al's head. An Ed with a Roy attached, while fangirls point and laugh in the background. A Roy thinking of miniskirts. And a Hughes with baby pictures. Oh yes! And an Ed with Scar.

I very much regret that I forgot my camera on the day of the Funimation photo shoot, so I didn't get any of the Armstrong cosplayer, the Al cosplayers (except for one of the human Als,) any of the Izumis, or the other Sins. Alas.

I've also decided that cosplaying, no matter how hard you work on the costume, is simply more effective when done in a group. I hope the next con I go to, I can manage to hook up with someone who's willing to co-ordinate.
 
 
Current Mood: pleasedpleased
Current Music: HT (Opening Theme) - Trigun
 
 
Kalika Maxwellkalikamaxwell on August 7th, 2004 11:20 pm (UTC)
I think the proper reaction to this is: XDDDD!

This fandom seriously lack humor. Thank you, the giggle was needed. :)
mikkeneko on August 7th, 2004 11:39 pm (UTC)
This fandom seriously lacks humor.

Does it really? Well, I guess it's good that most of my stuff is humor then. ^^; Funny stuff is usually easier for me to write, and here I was berating myself for not writing much serious fic yet...
(no subject) - kalikamaxwell on August 8th, 2004 12:01 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mikkeneko on August 8th, 2004 12:10 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - kalikamaxwell on August 8th, 2004 12:28 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mikkeneko on August 8th, 2004 12:32 am (UTC) (Expand)
DragonSoulhitokuse on August 7th, 2004 11:23 pm (UTC)
"Fullmetal," he said mildly, "we need to have a talk about exactly what regulations forbid taking clothes out of their superior officers' closets

Oh that is is just PERFECT. *Grins.* And just WHAT was Ed doing in Roy's closet, I wonder? ^_~
mikkeneko on August 7th, 2004 11:40 pm (UTC)
Goooood question. One that calls for a sequel. Written by somebody other than me. >_>
(no subject) - elanivalae on August 8th, 2004 01:38 am (UTC) (Expand)
FireDreamerchilayse on August 7th, 2004 11:24 pm (UTC)
I like the first envy a lot.

*snickers at the actual envy cosplayer* And now you're famous. That's kiryuutougasama

Nice pics. I wish I could have been there...of all years....*sighs*
FireDreamerchilayse on August 7th, 2004 11:25 pm (UTC)
Okay finished reading the fic. ...that's fantastic.
(no subject) - mikkeneko on August 7th, 2004 11:38 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - chilayse on August 7th, 2004 11:41 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mikkeneko on August 7th, 2004 11:50 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - chilayse on August 7th, 2004 11:52 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mikkeneko on August 8th, 2004 12:06 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - chilayse on August 8th, 2004 12:10 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - cocacat15 on August 7th, 2004 11:42 pm (UTC) (Expand)
mikkeneko on August 7th, 2004 11:49 pm (UTC)
Well, you can't ask too much of Roy before he's finished his coffee, can you? X3
(Deleted comment)
mikkeneko on August 7th, 2004 11:48 pm (UTC)
Not at all. I may not add you back, though. That journal is pretty empty -- basically, I created it so I'd have somewhere to put my fanworks so that my family wouldn't see them. >_>;
summerwolf on August 8th, 2004 12:59 am (UTC)
......

*mental pictures Roy and the shoes*

*dies laughing*

DUDE. YOU ROCK.
mikkeneko on August 8th, 2004 10:50 am (UTC)
See, I was having more fun picturing Ed in the shoes, but on reflection... X3 That's pretty awesome. I wonder if he has an outfit that goes with it?
EVILNEKOHILDAevilnekohilda on August 8th, 2004 03:35 am (UTC)
Cuuuuute. I see a need for me to do some fan art. Again XD (loving the cosplay pics too n_n)
mikkeneko on August 8th, 2004 11:21 am (UTC)
Ooh, fanart? :D That's an awesome concept. I can't draw worth beans. ^^;
tell them stories: la prime ministerdjcati on August 8th, 2004 04:12 am (UTC)
WOW. I loved that.. I've not read much FMA fiction, but I really liked this one. Brilliantly hilarious.

He was smiling, the same sort of smile he wore right before he turned roads into holes.

That was my favourite line. Perfect description, accurate and funny at the same time. :P

Well done on writing this... lol, I await more! Yes...
mikkeneko on August 8th, 2004 11:22 am (UTC)
Heh, thanks for reading it, especially if you don't read much, and I'm glad you liked it!
|<4ti3: huge blush4ti3k4t35 on August 8th, 2004 11:30 am (UTC)
*shrieks with laughter* Augh! I love you! This is...very evil. So nice. Love the cosplay, too. Especially the Roy. Yes. Love Roy. And the Envy with the sign. Very clever. ^_~ And that's a helluva lot of baby pictures. ^^;;;
mikkeneko on August 8th, 2004 05:55 pm (UTC)
I'm sure Hughes has at least that many if not more on his person. Had? Has.

I'll pass on the compliment to the Envy cosplayer. And thank you for liking my Roy costume. :3
(no subject) - 4ti3k4t35 on August 8th, 2004 05:58 pm (UTC) (Expand)
i am a jedi, like my father before me: twistertatooine on August 8th, 2004 11:46 am (UTC)
OMG, am dead of cute.

(No, seriously, that ficlet was great. *loves*)
mikkeneko on August 8th, 2004 05:54 pm (UTC)
Where did that "Am dead of..." originate, anyway?

And thanks. ^^
(no subject) - tatooine on August 8th, 2004 09:25 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - mikkeneko on August 8th, 2004 11:14 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Jadealiya: firejadealiya on August 8th, 2004 01:16 pm (UTC)
lol.....!!!!

the end definately makes the story - most amusing ^_^
mikkeneko on August 8th, 2004 05:53 pm (UTC)
Well, it wouldn't be much of a humor fic without the punch line, would it? X3

I mean, the image of Ed in six inch stilleto heels is pretty funny on its own, but still...!