Title: I Hate Everything About Him
Disclaimer: No I do not own FMA
Summary: Edward hates that bastard Colonel with every fiber in his body, and now he hates him more than ever. Ed's POV
Colonel Roy Mustang is a pompous self-righteous smug-ass heartless bastard. I have come to that conclusion after our most recent encounter. It had become routine by then, the whole deal where I’d get sent out on some pointless mission, most likely for some fake stone or help an old woman get her cat out of a tree. (Seriously, Al and I were asked to do crap like that dozens of times, and afterwards the bastard Colonel would make some smug comment about how I could reach the cat because of my height. Not like he needed to know that I had to climb up on Al’s shoulders to get to that branch…he would just tease me even more!) Then I’d get a telegram or a phone call from the office asking me to come in to report to the Colonel. Naturally, since that bastard gave me such bad vibes and I’m not one to ever be in the mood for that smug smirk or those cocky comments of his, I always tried to weasel my way out of it. Sometimes I even cut through other towns trying to find something to do just to delay the inevitable. But that jerk always managed to find me, and sometimes even pin me in a corner with no escape. It was hopeless; I was doomed to be that bastard’s dog for as long as he was my superior.
My Doomsday began when I got a note from one of the lower officers. It was a request from the Colonel for my latest report. I wrote it up rather quickly in my dorm room and approached Lieutenant Hawkeye to see if she would deliver it for me. I found her just before lunch and handed it to her. She smiled, shook her head, and handed it back to me, telling me the Colonel wanted it delivered directly to him from my own mouth. Now, that could’ve been taken in so many ways if you knew the Colonel like I did, but I also knew he treated the Lieutenant differently so she wouldn’t know of such things. I sighed and thanked her, then made my way to Mustang’s office. Al was still waiting for me at the library; since I told him I’d meet him there when I was through. Besides, there’s no need for him to see the banter that went on between the Colonel and I. His fragile young mind wouldn’t be able to handle it. So he was safest where he was. I’d meet him there shortly.
There was hardly a need to knock on the door as it fell open with just one tap of my metal hand. The Colonel looked up at me from a batch of papers on his desk and gave off that usual smug smirk of his. Oh, how I hated the way he looked at me like that. I loathed it with every fiber of my being. Why did he always have to be so fucking cocky with me? And that teasing! What the hell is with him! Now, now, settle down Edward. You’re getting ahead of yourself. He didn’t even say anything yet. After a long sigh I bit my lip and took a seat on the couch near his desk. My gold eyes fixated on his face, trying to see any sign of a taunting soon to come. Nothing yet, just that same damned smirk of his, his eyes shining as if he was laughing at how worked up I was getting over it. Why that bastard! Why wasn’t he saying anything? Laughing at me like that for no reason! Hold it Elric; you’re doing it again. With another sigh to help let out the pent up flames of my boiling temper, I clenched my fists on the knees of my black leather pants to avoid the temptation to throw anything at his head.
“Your report then Edward?” he asked casually, eyebrows raised in question, his chin resting on folded hands. Was he trying to be smug and cocky again? Was he? Damn it, I was starting to get paranoid…
I shifted in my seat a little, still keeping my gaze locked on him, trying my damned hardest not to look away or blink, to show any sign of weakness or defeat. There was no way in hell I would lose this one to him. Today FullMetal was going to come out on top! I reached to one side and pulled out the packet of papers that made up my report and handed it to him. He lazily flipped through the pages, set it on his desk and looked at me. Great, now that bastard was STARING at me. What? Did I have a bat in the cave? With my left hand I felt around my nose for anything he could be staring at, the cloth of the white glove tickling against my flaring nostrils. I shuddered as I felt a sneeze coming, trying so hard not to quiver or blink. But my body’s natural reaction conquered over my will and I sneezed, causing my eyes to be forced closed for a moment. Damn it all, he had won this silent war too.
“Allergies?” one of his brows rose slightly higher than the other.
I sniffed then glared at him, “Yeah I’m allergic to jackasses.”
“I thought you left the barnyard when you joined the ranks, FullMetal. Take the runt from the farm but you can’t take the farm from the runt.”
My fists clenched tighter. The height jokes I’m getting used to but how dare he pick on me for where I grew up! Resembool was a perfectly respectable town with one of the finest automail mechanics shops in the country! It may be a bit too rural for his liking, he was most likely a city boy growing up, but that gives him no excuse for that. I glowered, my lip twitching as I felt myself grow hot.
“Settle down Ed, I was only joking because you mentioned livestock and obviously this city is not a farm.” His voice was still cocky and smug with me. Damn that teasing!
“When I said jackass I meant you, Motherfucker--.” I snapped at him before I could catch myself all the way. Quicker than the words had come from my mouth, I bit my lip and looked away, knowing I was about to get barked at. Hell, had I gone any farther I could’ve been sentenced to be court-martialed…I really must keep my head level now.
“FullMetal…” The Colonel’s tone was very firm, and it stung me as a combination of warning and the fact I knew he was pissed. No matter how angry you get, you never utter the F-bomb in the office to your superior.
“Colonel I-“ My voice hitched in my throat as he slowly got up and came over to me. He bent down so his face was only inches from mine. I could smell the peppermint on his breath and that putrid stench of his cologne. It was a nasty combination of lilac, roses, lavender and man. It was vile and grotesque and made my stomach churn.
He grabbed the side of my face with one gloved hand and jerked so his eyes were looking into mine. I tried to remain looking angry and pissed at him, but my face failed me, for it was showing nothing but fear, my eyes wide and shaking. What was he going to do to me?
“Watch that filthy mouth of yours, FullMetal. It could get you into trouble one day…”
I glared, my teeth digging in hard into my lip. My hands rose to push him back but seemed to just freeze in midair. For a reason I did not know he grabbed those hands and with a loud snap he pinned them up and over my head behind me. It didn’t hurt too much so I knew he didn’t break anything, probably just strained the automail. “Bastard…” I mutter under my breath.
“Would you like me to clean that sewer you call a mouth FullMetal?”
The tension of his anger had eased and he was starting to get cocky yet again. He leaned in even closer and brushed his lips against mine, the heat of his breath soothing the swollen skin where my teeth were piercing. I murmured softly and wriggled helplessly in his grasp. Now, this was not the first time he’d done things like that to me. For it seemed that I was more than just his dog to him, I was also his most favorite plaything. A life-sized doll he could do as he pleased to and would not complain nor ask for anything in return. It totally went against the law of equivalent exchange, and he expected me to obey it every time. That was the main reason why I loathed the man. More than just his teasing, the smug smirk, and the cocky comments. He did things to me that a person does to the one they love, and I was so certain he loved me but just never admitted it. When he was touching me he never said “You look so fine right now,” or even a simple “I love you,”. No, he’d just make his comments, mess around with me, and then expect me to walk away like nothing had happened. Just drop me like a hot potato. I figured up until today that it was because I was his subordinate and he didn’t want people catching on, but then I realized there was more to it.
I didn’t realize it until then but as much as I found him disgusting and cruel. As much as I hated, loathed and despised him, there was a small flame of love for the man deep inside me. It sent heat through me whenever he’d look at me with the bedroom eyes or touched me. No! I hated him! I hated his guts! It was wrong!
My heart beat faster and grew heavy in my chest, my heated breath quickening. Against my firm will I released my lip and allowed some hormonal urges to take over, for me to kiss him. He seemed to like how easy he could get me to bend to him, for he immediately sought out to slip his tongue into my mouth. Winry had taught me how to kiss a couple of years ago when I had come in for some routine maintenance, and I had kissed the Colonel before so I was not at all new to it, and I immediately met his tongue with mine. They tangoed sweetly with each other shifting in and out between our mouths. Even though I was getting a bit of a rise from it, I made sure not to show it, to make him think it didn’t faze me at all. Unfortunately, I’d seem to not be able to get the hang of hiding things from it for he immediately knew and rested a hand on my knee. My eyes lowered as I felt that hand slide up to my thigh and dip in towards the crevice between my hips.
I broke away from the kiss immediately and shot a glare at him. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
He smirked and stroked between my legs on the tight leather. “What I always starting doing whenever I notice you get a rise.”
“No I’m not!” I retorted, my teeth clenching. “I want nothing of the sort from you!”
“Ed, you know as well as I do you say that same line every time…” he pressed his hand harder and I shuddered. “There now, see?”
“Damn you fuck-“ I was cut short when he shoved two fingers into my mouth.
“Good, now suck on that while I work you…” As soon as he said that, the hand between my legs undid my already loose belt, unbuttoned and unzipped my pants. He pulled them down with my boxers to just passed his knees then shifted on the couch so I was mostly on his lap. I was getting pissed. No matter how hard I gnawed on those fingers he still didn’t get the hint! It was like he’d developed the ability to ignore pain! Fucking bastard!
He pulled his cock out and faster than I could scream for him to stop he slammed it in to the only entrance I had back there, my own erection stroking against the fabric of his jacket, beads of precum flicking off. I dug my teeth in hard to his fingers and he hissed, “I said suck, not bite, FullMetal.”
“Suck my ass!” I snapped but his fingers muffled it so it came out sounding like “Fuck my ass,”. Shit, now I was in trouble.
He did just as he was told, pounding me hard. Even though I should’ve been used to this sort of treatment, it hurt so fucking much. I couldn’t even moan or cry out, all I could do was clutch tightly onto his shoulders and ride him like the Mustang he was. Tears beaded in my eyes, and my moans were heavily muffled as his fingers were nearly gagging me. He was slamming it in hard, my own cock violently rubbing against various articles of his clothing. Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore and reached down to stroke myself. The touch was nowhere near as pleasurable as it would’ve been if he was to do it, but damn it I was hard! It was hurting me more not to please myself.
It wasn’t long before he buried his head into my neck, a surefire sign he was almost there. He groaned as I could feel his pace pick up even more. A shudder ripped through him as I could feel a blast of warmth inside and I knew he had come. It was just in time too, for I had reached my peak myself, my own fluids coating my hand, shaft, and pants. If a few drops flew and landed on him, they were unnoticeable. We both sat there for a moment, panting, trying to regulate breathing before he pulled out. He shoved me off to one side of the couch and barked at me to dress. I bit my lip and did so, without arguing, feeling downright used.
The thighs of my pants were sticky and I knew I’d have to wash them after I took a shower. Yet it seemed that bastard Colonel had kept himself clean as usual. I was always the one getting coated, covered, and filled. I was tired of being the doll, the toy.
The loud stomp echoed through the room as I looked him straight in the eye and asked, “Why?”
He just arched a brow and looked as if he didn’t understand.
“Why do you always do this to me? You tease me, anger me, and get me riled up and for what? Do you get a sexual kick out of seeing angry teenage boys? What the fuck is wrong with you! What the hell am I to you?”
I could tell that stung him a bit because he got shifty. I knew it! This was what it took to get him to admit to me that he loved me, I was so sure of it.
“You’re my subordinate FullMetal,” he responded in a calm monotone.
“THEN WHAT WAS ALL OF THIS?”
He sighed and held his hands behind his back, looking at me sternly. “I thought all of this is what you wanted from me. Is that not true? Did you-do you want me? It seems so because you were so easy to give in each time.”
“N-no-Yes! But then what did all of this mean to you? Am I just your toy?”
“No, but I was certain that is what you’ve thought of me all this time.”
That was a blow I couldn’t block even if I wanted to. He wasn’t using me…never had. The man was just going by the vibes I gave off to him-to keep me content. In reality, I was using him. But instead of making me feel guilty, it angered me up to my boiling point. There was no way I was going to let him know that I knew he was right. Without thinking, I swung my right arm, the metal one, and it collided with his jaw.
Panting, I said in a soft growl, “The-then…you don’t…”
The hit to the face angered him, and I couldn’t blame him. It was fucking foolish of me to strike him like that without much reason. Swifter than a fox he grabbed me hard by jaw and tilted me up so my eyes were locked into his fiery gaze. “No FullMetal,” he whispered. “I do not love you.”
He let me go then and I fell back, my knees shaking. I had been wrong about everything, and felt like a complete asshole about it all. But now a new question formed in my mind. “Then who?”
“Yes,” he replied, his arms crossing. “My heart does belong to another, if they were only willing to lend me there’s.”
At this point, I was trying my damned hardest to fight back the heated tears welling up. I would not show any sign of weakness or sorrow. I would not let him know that with all that was just said and done he had taken my heart, ripping it in half, and smashed it into a thousand pieces. He had his way with me, flung me aside, made me realize that I’ve been the asshole all this time and to top it off he felt nothing for me other than the normal solider-to-soldier respect. And here I was, all this time, secretly willing to give him my heart because I was so certain he loved me…and it was all for nothing. He was just my Colonel, and I was his subordinate. We were not meant to me.
Tears started beading and falling down my heavily flushed face. I clenched my fists and shouted, “What heart? How could anyone love you, you heartless power-hungry bastard!” And with that I wiped my eyes and dashed out, slamming the door hard behind me.
Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye was standing outside his door when I came out, papers clutched to her breast. I wasn’t sure how long she had been waiting, but I started to get really tense. Had she heard? Would she tell everyone? I decided to shut her up before she said anything by shooting her an icy cold glare. She in return, looked surprised and responded with a quizzical expression. I shot another one just to be sure, and then stormed off to meet with Al and go yell at him about how much I hate the Colonel.
Because now I hate that bastard more than ever.
But why was she there?
Hope you all like! ^_^;
x-posted to fm_alchemist fma_yaoi My own LJ