Ter (terrierlee) wrote in fm_alchemist,

  • Mood:
  • Music:

Fic: BarryFarman

Title: The Wonders of Being Stuck in a Closet with a Serial Killer
Author/Artist: terrierlee
Warnings: Groping XD That's basicly it.
Rating: PG-13
Pairings: BarryFarman
Summary: When trying to get a chessboard, Farman and Barry get trapped in a closet. Insanity insues.
Author's Notes: This is pure crack on my part. I'm actually trying to get my friends to write more BarryFarman. Until they can, I shall :D

Farman glared at the wall. It wasn't his fault he was trapped in this closet. With a serial killer. Oh dear.

It all started when Barry wanted to play some chess. So Farman went to the closet, where the chess board was hidden. As he stepped unto a stool, Barry came up behind him. Farman was too busy searching on the top shelf to see the suit of armor come up behind him.

"Find it yet Chief?"

Farman toppled over and crashed, causing Barry to fall over, causing the floor to shake causing the door to swing shut.

They were stuck.

Which is where they were at this very second. But after ten rounds of chess, you tend to get bored easily. Barry started to hum while Farman tried to figure a way out. He didn't know alchemy. Riza made sure that there were no knives in the apartment...

Farman shifted his weight so it was on his other leg. The closet barely fit the both of them. well, it was pretty tall, and there was some room to walk about, but that was kinda hard considering a large suit of armor blocked the doorway. Farman sighed and glared a closed-eyed glare.

"If you hadn't of scared me like that, we wouldn't be stuck in here."

"But I was only wondering if you found the chessboard." Barry murmured in a subdued voice.

The wallflower of a warrant officer leaned against the wall. There MUST be a way out. Oh who made these doors lock automatically?

Somewhere, on the other side of the Gate, someone sneezed.

Better to stay quiet. Farman mused. And too much movement would make the closet hot. Just stay still. Keep breathing regular. Yeah.

Either way, the room started to get stuffy. So stuffy is was causing Farman's eyes to droop. He fell backwards and onto the suit of armor that was behind him.

Barry "felt" something fall on him. He picked up his head and turned it around. Farman was dead asleep on him. He put his head back on and turned around swiftly, like a ninja, so Farman wouldn't fall on the floor and hurt his head.

The buff wallflower murmured in his sleep and rested his head on Barry's shoulder.

Now, if Barry could blink, he would have been blinking up a storm. But Barry's a suit of armor, and like Al, can't blink. Barry got an evil idea in his head. Farman was defenseless when sleeping.

Barry laid his hand on Farman's stomach and lifted his shirt enough for his armored hand to get under. The man sleeping on him made a gurgled noise at the sudden metal that touched his stomach. The ex-serial killer moved his hand up further, even an even BETTER plan popped into his hollow helmet. He brought his hand upward, feeling up on Farman's ribbed abdomen.

When the closet door suddenly opened, showing Havoc with a nonchalant face to a "WTF!?" face. Farman, who was only asleep due to the stuffiness of the cramped space, awoke at the sudden air that hit his face.

It was only then did he realize Havoc standing there with a totally shocked expression. He didn't know why until Barry removed his hand from his chest. Farman jumped up, banging his head against the coathanger, thus knocking him out again.

By this time, Havoc had passed out on the floor again.

Barry shrugged, lifted Farman and brought him to his bed. He left Havoc where he was.

  • Post a new comment


    Comments allowed for members only

    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded