Pairing: EdWin -Hinted-
Warning: No MAJOR spoilers, just basic fluff and angst. o_o Unless you count Ho-ho papa as a spoiler..>>;
Set during…which ever you prefer, Anime or manga, doesn’t make a difference. XD Also lots of Ed hating Ho-ho Papa.
Short, angst, and fluffy Fanfic ahead, you have be warned o.o
Disclaimer: FMA doesn’t belong to me.
I never understood why father left us, why he abandons me, mom and Al all of those years. I try and try to understand but I could never get the answer I want. Why did father have us if he didn’t love mother? Why did he leave her to suffer? Why didn’t he come home when I send all of those letters? Why didn’t he come home whenever he had the time? Why didn’t he? Why!?
He was arrogant bastard who left mother to die, he didn’t even come to mother funeral and yet he dare to show up 4 years later in front of aunt Pinako house and ask where his house was. How can he ask such a simple question to someone who watched our mother die? If he would have been there, mother would have still been alive, and we would have never though of doing what we wanted to do…
It was prohibiting…I knew but of course, I never listen. I continue with it, creating the most sinful thing ever…
…Tried to bring her to life
To see her beautiful smile once again….but what did I earn at the end? Nothing. She didn’t come back and I almost ended up losing the only family I had left.
I endanger my own flesh for my own selfishness…
What kind of a older brother am I if I endanger my youngest brother? Mother would be shame of me if she saw me right now…My arms and legs not even human, instead replace by metal.
I live with this sin, my brother doesn’t need to carry things…I, alone, will carry it for him.
“Edward?” I hear a voice, a very familiar and yet friendly voice. Slapping back to reality I looked before me, to see my best friend standing in front of me with her arms cross. “Are you going to sit there all day? Or are you to conformable to help me with these tools?”
It was true, all I did since I came back for my automail check was sit there and stare into space. Thinking…thinking of things that bring back painful memories…
“Hello!” I could hear her growing aggravate.
“Ok, ok” I smiled weakly, getting my butt off the chair and grabbing a hold of the tool box she wanted me to help her with. “Where do I put it?” I asked, noticing as she removes her gloves from her small and pale hands. “Over there” She pointed, it was a small cabinet near the kitchen walls, slowly but steady I moved over and place the box inside where it belong. “How you get this thing out in the first place?”
“I didn’t, Al helped me earlier, I asked you before but you didn’t even flick your eyes for a minute to look at me…it was as if you were in a trance.” She hesitated “Are you ok Ed? You seem a bit….down earlier.”
I blinked and look at her, ‘Oh’ was all that came to mind. “I was just thinking, that’s all.” I place one arm behind my back and scratch it off like I used to do as a little kid when I was thinking of an excuse. She stares at me oddly before walking into the kitchen “Ok…you want something to eat?” She asked me.
“Sure…” I replied.
Walking behind her, I took a seat in the nearest chair as I watch her take out a few things out of the fridge.” Sandwich will do right?” I nod.
I watch her carefully as she began to make our sandwiches, carefully watch as her pale hands moved around to grad the ingredients. It reminded me of my mother, when mom used to make us sandwiches…I remember it so clearly. The smile she used put on her face when we jumped in joy as we devour our food. Those were the days usually when mom was too tired to cook, after all that cleaning, you would get tired too. She worked so hard…to keep the house in clean and top shape.
“Ouch!” I slap back to reality once again, only to see Winry had cut herself with the knife.
“Winry!” I yelled, as I stood up from my chair and walked towards her, grabbing a hold of her hand.
“Is nothing!” She blushed, “Just a small cut, I will just have to get a bandage for it and I will be as good as new!”
Without much though, I did the one thing I never expected to do….”E-Edward!” She stutters, who could blame her? I just basically grad a whole of her hand, scoop up her finger and gently kissing the blood away. “That’s gross!” she tried to move her hand from my hold. “Stop it!” She yells.
“Sorry…” I let go of her hand, “Just something mother used to do when me or Al got cuts in our fingers… she said kissing away the blood would make the cut heal faster. To believe I still remember that.” I look down at the floor, too afraid to look at Winry in the eye.
Silence took over, and I can tell Winry gasped earlier, “Edward…that’s normal. Those are good memories of your mother you still keep within you. Instead of hearing about how horrible you feel what happen to Al, or what you try to bring back…Ed, you should treasure those memories…they are the happy ones. They will keep you moving forward…”
I chuckle “Those thoughts don’t keep me from moving forward, is the pain that does…”
“Ed…That’s not true. Why do you always beat yourself up? What happen that day 4 years ago was clearly an act of a child…You wanted your mother back. I don’t blame you…But Ed, don’t remorse yourself in those thoughts.” I look at her, fighting against the tears I haven’t dropped in years.
But the next few words were probably what left my eyes wide open…“Live, Ed, Live. Not just for our sakes, but for yours as well” Those were words I haven’t hear in years, the meaning of live had so many meanings but always ended up saying the same thing. Living is to be alive and to been alive is to enjoy what’s there in your life. Although I lost mostly all I held on dearly, I still have a home to come back to, family that loved me and memories I made every time I returned. Because after all, I am so only human…
“Thanks Win…” I smile, as she lifted one arm to my cheek and touch it softly. With instinct, I grad a hold of her arm and brought her to my chest, embracing her into a hug. “Thanks” I smell her sweet scent.
Flushed and relief, Winry put her arms around my waist, replying with the same soft embrace I was giving her. “You’re welcome…” I hear her whisper in my chest.
There was one thing I did learn from my old man when he returned that day, when I asked him if he loved our mother or not….
“I did love her, and when you have someone you care for that way you will understand how much I did…I am responsible and I am sadden by her death, but just remember, we love each other no matter what.”
He was right about one thing…
Loving someone was the most wonderful feeling in the world.
And right now, I was enjoying that very moment in my life.
O_o Don’t asked me what I was thinking when I wrote this…I think is a bit mess up, and I am sorry if it doesn’t have much of a plot. I just felt like writing pointless fluff because I am a freak of EdWin and I thought of contributing to the community. Please review, they are nice.