Summary: A regular transmutation goes bizarrely awry and leads to a situation Edward and Alphonse never expected.
Previous Parts: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8-10
Roy wisely signed out a truck instead of one of the plain black cars that the military liked to conduct business in. Edward sat up front with Havoc, who was completely avoiding Edana.
Edana and Alphonse sat in the truck bed. Edana hooked her arms over the side of the truck bed and watched Central go past, wide-eyed and grinning. Alphonse shifted over to her side of the truck bed, curious. “You act as if you’ve never seen Central before,” he said.
She shrugged. “It’s not like I haven’t,” she said. “It looks exactly the same, and yet… it feels so different than home. It’s like looking at a whole new city.” She shook her head, blonde bangs flowing in the wind. “I can’t describe it Al, sorry. It’s just… new.”
They rumbled to a stop in front of Central station. “Wait here,” Edward said to Havoc, hopping out of the front seat.
“You’re the boss,” Havoc muttered. At least his nose had stopped bleeding. Havoc wondered if he’d ever be able to breathe through it again.
Edana hopped over the side of the truck to join Edward. She grinned at him, and was rewarded with a sour look. “Aw, don’t be so upset,” she said. “The whole point of this exercise is to be rid of us, remember?”
“I keep telling myself that,” Edward said. At least, Edana noticed, he didn’t look like he would strangle Al when he saw him like he was threatening to when they left headquarters. “And there he is… what the HELL is THAT?”
Alphonse was standing by one of the loading platforms, hands in his pockets and looking all together too pleased with himself. “Good morning, ‘niisan,” he said with a smile. “And to you too, ‘neesan. Did you give the colonel a heart attack?”
“Not for lack of trying,” Edana said, goggling. “What…is that what I think…”
Then, at the same time, Edward and Edana burst out laughing.
“Aw, you’re hurt their feelings,” Alphonse said, patting one of the two “statues” that were half-crated and seated on the platform beside him. “What do you think?”
Edward was doubled over from laughing, and Edana was leaning on his back, trying to keep her own balance. Tears of laughter were streaming down her face. “Al, that is the BEST THING I’ve ever SEEN!”
“I think,” one of the statues said darkly, “that I’m going to kill each and every one of you in the most painful way I can think of.”
That sent the pair of them into even more whooping laughter. “I think,” Edward said between choked-back bouts of laughter, “we need to get Al … my Al … out here to help carry the … statues.”
The curious passerby couldn’t find a reason why the blonde pair thought the statues were so funny. They looked slightly strange, but not entirely bad. Once Edward had composed himself enough to not snicker as much, he walked around the crates, running his left hand over the surface. “You used clay?”
“Mostly. “ Alphonse was seated on the edge of one of the crates. Edward hadn’t bothered to ask which statue was which. “I thought it would look strange for more suits identical to your Al to be walking around Central. “
“I’m glad everyone has common sense, then,” Edward said, as Edana and Alphonse came up the stairs.
“It was my “’niisan’s idea,” Alphonse continued, amused. “Although, I’m willing to bet he isn’t as keen on it anymore.”
“You’d be right,” the statue under Edward’s hand said gruffly.
Alphonse stopped short at the statues. “Oh, dear,” he said. “Now I’m really, really glad the colonel signed us out a truck.”
“The bastard probably already knew,” Edward muttered. “Did you grab Havoc?”
“He was pulling down the ramp. How are we going to do this?” Edana started walking around the crates as well. “Nice work, Al,” she said.
“Thanks,” he said, patting the one he was perched on. “This one’s your sister.”
Edana immediately switched statues. “Hey, Al,” she said. “You doing all right in there?”
“Hey, ‘neesan,” the Alanza statue said weakly. “Are we at headquarters yet?”
“We will be soon,” Edana soothed. “Just a little while longer, okay?”
“Kay…” The Alanza statue didn’t sound too strong. “I… can’t see at all.”
Alphonse looked concerned as he hopped down. “”Is she all right?” he asked Edana quietly.
“She better be,” Edana growled at him, threat quite evident in her voice. “She doesn’t like the dark.”
Just then, Havoc appeared up the stairs, dragging a wheeled trolley behind him. “There’s a ramp on the other side of the building,” he announced, “before anyone decides to jump on me for grabbin’ something with wheels.’
He stopped at the top of the steps, where the human Alphonse was goggling at him. “…what? Do I still got blood on my face?”
“I thought you said that Havoc was with you,” Alphonse said to Edward, looking confused.
Edward blinked at him. “…he is.”
Havoc looked from Edward to Alphonse. “Whuh?”
Alphonse stared at Havoc, then burst out laughing. He leaned back against the Alanza statue, laughing hard.
“Okay, I’m seriously missing something here,” Edana said, raising her hand.
Havoc scratched the back of his head. “I’ve been missing something all day,” he muttered. “Hey, Alphonse, help me lift this statue onto the trolley?”
“Hey,” the Edward statue said, sounding confused. “Is that the bastard colonel?”
“No, ‘niisan,” Alphonse said, still choking back laughter. “I’ll explain at the base.”
Comprehension dawned on Edward’s features, and he let out a disbelieving laugh. Edana propped her fists on her hips and glowered. “Care to let the rest of us in on the joke?”
Edward composed himself again. “Their Colonel Mustang must look like Havoc,” he said, pointing at Havoc as he spoke.
“WHAT!” Havoc screeched, almost dropping his side of the crate.
“Don’t drop me!” Alanza wailed.
By now the commotion had attracted some attention from curious passerby. The flesh Alphonse rapped on Alanza’s statue after they put her onto the trolley. “IX-nay on the Alking-tay,” he muttered. “We’ve drawn a crowd.”
Edward darted off to grab another trolley as Havoc and the armor-bound Alphonse started maneuvering the cart towards the exit. Edana stood by the human Alphonse, amused. “So you mean to tell me, that your …” she glanced around, then dropped her voice. “Your world’s Havoc is a dark-haired, dark-eyed guy?”
Alphonse nodded, amused. “He always gets all the dates, though … our Colonel is constantly tearing his hair out about it, too.”
Edward returned then, cart in tow. “Let’s get your brother out of here,” he muttered, trying to ignore the people now moving about. He could hear some muttering about siblings and twins and it was beginning to grate on him.
“He’s technically your brother too,” Alphonse pointed out mildly, as he grabbed a corner of the crate. Edana grabbed the other side before Edward could come around, and when he gave her a Look she glowered at him.
Deciding it would be wisest not to say anything, Edward instead held the cart still as they hoisted the “statue” onto it. “Now, let’s get out of here,” Alphonse said, patting the side of the crate reassuringly. “And meet YOUR Colonel Mustang.”
I think this story has completely eaten my brain. >.> I got mad a piece of plot yesterday (AUGH) so I drew instead. :D
One of these days I'll actually remember to change the journal before I post it. >.>