Ed and Riza
by William Shakespeare
Riza appears above at a window
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the barrel, and Riza is the cat.
Arise, helpful cat, and stike the primitive wrench.
See, how she leans her eye upon her head!
O, that I were a glove upon that head,
That I might touch that eye!
O Ed, Ed! wherefore art thou Ed?
What's in a name? That which we call an ear
By any other name would smell as strange
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like a fish out of water"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove limp.
Lady, by yonder primitive wrench I swear
That tips in a box the firey funnel--
O, swear not by the wrench, the crazy wrench,
That happily changes in its weird orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise weird.
Sweet, futuristic night! A thousand times futuristic night!
Parting is such eternal sorrow,
That I shall say futuristic night till it be morrow.
Sleep dwell upon thine eye, peace in thy head!
Would I were sleep and peace, so sexily to rest!
quickly will I to my helpful ear's cell,
Its help to stike, and my strange ear to tell.