The Tin Foil Alchemist
I will tell you a story that’s only half-true. It starts with a man who we will call Hoho-papa. Now Hoho-papa befriended a lady whose name we cannot say, so we shall call her ‘that person’. Hoho-papa and ‘that person’ had a deep relationship and soon, they had a son, who we shall call Hoju. Sadly, when their son was only eighteen, he died of disease.
So, Hoho-papa and ‘that person’ tried to bring him back to life, only instead of their golden-haired son, they got an androgynous palm tree that took the form of a lightbulb. After that, Hoho-papa and ‘that person’ were turned into zombies that only lived by eating other peoples’ brains. They did that for four hundred years, before Hoho-papa escaped from ‘that person’ and started another family in the country. There, his new wife gave birth to a shrimp and a tin can. Now, soon, Hoho-papa had to eat some more brains, so he ate his new wife’s brain and then ran off, leaving his two sons with some nearby neighbors.
The shrimp and tin can grew up, and the shrimp decided to join the army so he could find his dad. So in the army, he found a pyromaniac, a man with a daughter complex, a gun-woman and Mr. Clean-look-a-like. He befriended the pyromaniac and started a relationship, while the tin can started a relationship with a cat.
On the shrimp’s journey, he met a vomiting ninja housewife, the vomiting ninja housewife’s hubby, seven strange beings with weird tattoos, one that looked like Hoho-papa’s failed attempt to bring back his first son, an armor that loved to chop things, an old woman that seemed to know about Hoho-papa, and a man with an ‘X’ over his eye and a long tattoo on his right arm, who we shall call David.
The shrimp and tin can fought all these people, or most anyway, and found out about their father’s true age and past relationship. Then, ‘that person’ appeared and turned the tin can into a Starburst and had an orange start to eat him. The shrimp and Hoho-papa were thrown into a mirror and had to live on the other side of the looking glass.
On the other side of the looking glass, where ‘that person’ is, she was having a wonderful time making fun of those weird beings, when the shrimp came back after getting ‘zeppelin’d’ from the other side of the mirror. He attacked the palm tree/lightbulb thing that Hoho-papa made four hundred years ago, and saved the tin can. ‘That person’ escaped through an elevator, only to have the orange eat her up.
The tin can then disappeared, beyond the looking glass, meeting up with his father in Germany. When the shrimp woke up after his hard battle, he found himself a boy and the palm tree/lightbulb was the way he was four hundred years ago. The tin can had saved them all.
Then the pyromaniac and his army stole the shrimp/boy and kept him hidden away in a mansion, but after a later thought, invited the shrimp’s older brother to stay. They named the mansion, “The House of Smexy-ness”.
Now, you can believe what I told you, or go and find out by yourselves. It all depends really. But I did tell you that the story was only half true.
This is what I had to just type up for Creative Writing. A story that's only half true. >>