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31 January 2005 @ 09:46 am
Scar: assessing the fashion sense of a fanatic badass murderer  
What follows is a fashion critique of the character Scar. Spoilers for everything. Hard language and pathetic squeeing abound. You have been warned.

It is a fact universally acknowledged that Edward Elric, titular hero of Fullmetal Alchemist, is hot. Not just a little bit hot. Not just glancingly hot, or fortuitously hot: Edward (middle name unknown) Elric is endlessly, eternally hot. All 170-whatever centimeters of him.

Everyone sees this.

What is less clear, unfortunately, is the hotness of one of him main rivals, the murderously badass Ishibal exile... known only to fandom by the somewhat unsexy name of "Scar." (Yes, Scar is an unsexy name... run any Google search and you'll find that the only other major cartoon character with that name is the evil scheming pretender of the Lion King, who is in fact a lion and who appears to be the anthropomorphic incarnation of Severus Snape, at least as far as physiognomy is concerned).

I think Scar is sexy. I think he is beautifully, hauntingly sexy. I think he is complicated and interesting and so, so hot. Because I think all of these things, I have decided to share a little primer on the evolution of Scar’s fashion-sense. Because, well. Because I can.

So, let us start from the beginning, why don’t we?

This is Scar when he was around Ed’s age (somewhere in the 12-16 range, I can’t really tell). This is the only time in his life he had regularly colored hair, although I think his hair is suspiciously grey even here. When compared to Edward he has a less ethereal look… not so much the Michelangelo's David; more of a Botticelli. His eyes and skin are striking, but when combined with his physique he looks rather like your average dust-covered little boy.

Looks, however, are something he can’t help. So let’s look at what he chooses to wear.

Honestly, I’m a bit at a loss to pinpoint the exact influence of this garb, although it is clearly a continental Asian look with a touch of Persian/Turkish charm. I suspect that he bought the brown shirt and cargo pants at Old Navy, however. Important to note is the long orange-and-black striped cloth that he has tied around his body, probably to hold that rucksack rag that he’s wearing in place. Although boys this age are usually pretty impatient and careless, it’s clear that this outfit has the methodical layering so typical of a traditional Ishibalite. There is not a whiff of rebellion in this garb.

This is what happens when he is a little bit older, and embroiled in the genocidal conflict that ends up causing him to be the bitter and vengeful man we later come to know and (in my case) love:

Ugh. My eyes! Scar is really hideous in these pictures, and not even in the “sexy ugly” way. Although he can’t be more then 22 years old, his hair is totally white. I have decided that his hair went white when he underwent the trauma of seeing his precious nii-san transformed from “intelligent, respectable older brother that I’m proud of” into insane alchemically-obsessed ressurectionist/necrophiliac who later becomes a bloody eunuch before his very eyes.

Looking at his clothing you can see that he’s still got the orange-stripy cloth and the rucksack rags. My suspicion is that the people of Ishibalite basically wear all of their clothes that they have ever owned for their entire life and only discard the things that really, honestly just don’t fit anymore. Somewhere along the line he’s acquired a nice army-green shirt that fits his bigger body, and he has darker cargo pants (suspiciously appearing to have a zipper around the knees so that they can be converted into shorts… these are the kind of pants my parents go absolutely crazy about as vacation-gear because they are OMG SO FUNCTIONAL). He also has boots. These are not sexy black Harley Davidson boots, like the kind that Edward wears… these appear to be barely holding on to life, completely exhausted shoes that were never intended to life the hard life their owner is brutally eking out of them.

Scar now has an accessory, the rifle. He appears to be handling it competently but it doesn’t really make him look that strong. Instead he looks exactly like what he is: a desperate and scared young adult who is completely out of his league and living in day-to-day trauma. Let’s not forget this.

This is the look of Scar when he first meets Ed, on the steps of the library. This is after he has THE ARM but before he knows what it is capable of doing. One can only guess at how he has been spending his life in the time since his brother died after acquiring that arm, wandering from place to place, living like a beggar and in complete fear of being found out for being an Ishibalite. Now he’s totally grown up, and is coming into his own in terms of hotness. His nose and jaw and eyes are just so nice.

The first thing to comment on is the fact that he’s still wearing that orange-stripy cloth. I am beginning to come to the conclusion that it is his Moses cloth, something that he has owned ever since he was a baby as a gift from his mom (who I am so totally sure died before he ever got a chance to know her). Not that Scar was rescued from the river in a basket of reeds, or whatever… I think his brother raised him… but it’s a little piece of memorabilia from his youth that’s nice to see that he’s still keeping track of.

This outfit is so Abercrombie & Fitch, it’s embarrassing. Doesn’t Scar realize that the whole sexy camping look is so 1990s? Some little details of his clothes, however, suggest a more modern and refined taste. The white shirt appears to be made of linen and is loose and flowy and probably very comfortable… but at the wrists and the waist it has these little slits that just scream casual-cool. Although the man appears to be congenitally unable to prefer anything but cargo pants, these are his most evolved and hottest cargo pants yet.

Accessory-wise, Scar has lost the rifle and now sports sunglasses. These are the Best Sunglasses Ever. I find it highly amusing that in this world of trains and pocketwatches and other retro bits of technology, Scar sports the most cutting edge sunglasses in existence. You just know that these babies have both UVA and UVB protection, and are probably polarized on top of everything else.

Now Scar is wearing actually sturdy boots. These appear made for mountain climbing or defeating lions in hand-to-hand combat. The SUVs of boots. I approve.

Last, and penultimately: Scar in his ultimate form. Terrorist.

Now, some people are put off by Scar because of the fact that he murders so many people. But his murder spree is completely discriminate and he acts like a man at war against a far more vast and terrible enemy. It is easy for us to see the military of Fullmetal Alchemist as being full of nice guys, because it is, but that doesn’t change the fact that the military represents a kind of totalitarian expansionistic imperialistic racist hegemony that begs to be destroyed.


But let's not go there! This is a fashion critique, not a ill-disguised screed against the excesses of my own country's foreign policy practices.

I think it is fairly obvious that Scar's clothes here are stolen. He's completely abandoned all elements of his Ishibal past (which was probably a considerable emotional sacrifice). The orange stripy cloth, in particular, is totally gone… I'm sure it went down in flames along with Scar's real name. (*sniffles over the angst for a moment, and then moves on*). Now he looks like some kind of badass rapper with those giant black and white sports pants (which are so totally made of nylon or some other synthetic material). The best thing is the yellow coat, which is just about three sizes too small (just like his grinchy heart, I suppose). Well, the coat and the Best Sunglasses Ever. I want him to just strip right now.

Mischief managed!

Okay, honestly people. I love Scar. I think he's just the neatest thing ever and I don't care if it appears that I am on crack when I say this. But if this little piece of… um… whatever… helps convince even one person to write hot porny Scar slash to look at Scar in a different light, I think my work here is done.

Credits for images:

The last picture is the small version of a wallpaper that I found here.

The Ed screenshot is something I gacked from fma_screencaps, probably from the many pictures uploaded by winter_ruins.

Sadly I do not remember where I got the Scar images, but as they are basically studio shots that are widely available online I am less concerned about crediting the source.

All images are hosted on my own website. Of course.
Current Mood: predatorypredatory
Current Music: as cool as i am dar williams
(Deleted comment)
Number One Spoon: too brightherongale on January 31st, 2005 01:59 pm (UTC)
Pleasure to serve. Long live ridiculous Envy impersonations of Edward to show us the true beauty of the oldest Elric brother!
(Deleted comment)
(no subject) - herongale on January 31st, 2005 10:49 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(Deleted comment)
(no subject) - herongale on February 1st, 2005 07:39 am (UTC) (Expand)
Sarah ♪: ed - mr elric  (me)ramen_rules on January 31st, 2005 07:27 am (UTC)
I am beginning to come to the conclusion that it is his Moses cloth

Number One Spoon: my scorn is awesomeherongale on January 31st, 2005 02:00 pm (UTC)
You like?
(no subject) - ramen_rules on June 20th, 2005 04:26 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Aubrey Myersarmaina on January 31st, 2005 07:51 am (UTC)
This I will ALWAYS believe

And scar is totally a sexy name (plus, I totally dig the dark skin/light hair combo)
so you are not alone ^^
Number One Spoon: a wolf in his mindherongale on January 31st, 2005 02:01 pm (UTC)
I think his name is sexy, but only after struggling over the issue quite a bit and sublimating a lot of inappropriate giggles over the subject. I mean, it would not be easy to make love to a man named Scar.

Could you imagine calling that out in the middle of a hot and heavy orgasm? I would totally die!
darjeeling darlingmalika on January 31st, 2005 08:21 am (UTC)
Scar is hot! Brown people represent >.> I was v. sad when he died. ::cries::

and who appears to be the anthropomorphic incarnation of Severus Snape

and holy crap, I NEVER noticed that... I can never watch the Lion King again without trying to assign a Harry Potter character to each animal -_____- would zazu be mcgonagall?

totalitarian expansionistic imperialistic racist hegemony that begs to be destroyed.

the US, racist? nevar! :O just because we're trying to destroy the whole Middle East doesn't mean we're racist... *snerk*
Number One Spoon: reki- shy but happyherongale on January 31st, 2005 02:04 pm (UTC)
Damn straight, Scar represents. Scar represents old school.

As for who the other characters in the Lion King translate into... I'll table that question until I rewatch that movie. In, um, the next 10 years.

(no subject) - malika on January 31st, 2005 07:27 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Pretty Arbitraryprettyarbitrary on January 31st, 2005 08:48 am (UTC)
(just like his grinchy heart, I suppose)

*dies of laughter*

But yes. Scar is hot. Even with his often unfortunate taste in clothing. Who cares? We're just looking at what's underneath it his face, anyway.
Number One Spoon: shifty!herongale on January 31st, 2005 02:06 pm (UTC)
Unfortunate? I'd call it damn well aggressively awful. Except that I think he looks hot in everything... *happy sigh* He could go around naked in my wettest dreams for all I care.
(no subject) - koenta on January 31st, 2005 05:57 pm (UTC) (Expand)
gilwen_sumergilwen_sumer on January 31st, 2005 09:02 am (UTC)
I Solomly Swear That I Am Up To No Good
XD! Scar shure is teh shmexy!! <3! *drools over him* He's got to be the best baddie around!!!
patosanpatosan on January 31st, 2005 09:31 am (UTC)
Re: I Solomly Swear That I Am Up To No Good
Omg, Al is actually well hot in that icon of yours.
Re: I Solomly Swear That I Am Up To No Good - gilwen_sumer on January 31st, 2005 01:10 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Re: I Solomly Swear That I Am Up To No Good - herongale on January 31st, 2005 02:07 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Kyrareikah on January 31st, 2005 09:44 am (UTC)
Excuse me, I'm just fangirling you. You have spoken my mind! I and, I'm sure, many other Scar fans all over the internet will be queueing up for miles to shake you by the hand! We are liberated!

Yes, Scar is extremely hot, in a 'mature, non-jailbait-y' kind of way.
Cuddlefishmoumusu on January 31st, 2005 09:56 am (UTC)
I think we should make a circle and sway back and forth and sing. What'll we sing?
(no subject) - herongale on January 31st, 2005 02:11 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - moumusu on January 31st, 2005 03:19 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - herongale on January 31st, 2005 02:10 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Cuddlefish: Wham Bam Thank You Ma'ammoumusu on January 31st, 2005 09:55 am (UTC)
This is hysterical. Again and again and again and again and AGAIN. There are so many funnies I can't even think. Plus it's about Scar, and I can feel the love. So you're great, and I still love Scar. I'd try to write something else coherent, but you used that last picture, and, well. I'm no good after that. (Can I sit with you there, Mr. Scar Man?)
Number One Spoon: break faithherongale on January 31st, 2005 02:12 pm (UTC)
Scar invites you to sit in his lap. You may cuddle him if you are careful not to disturb his brooding.
(no subject) - moumusu on January 31st, 2005 03:18 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Vforever_alone on January 31st, 2005 10:04 am (UTC)
BEST. POST. EVER. I love Scar!!!
Number One Spoon: luff!herongale on January 31st, 2005 02:13 pm (UTC)
Scar loves you too, honey. :) In his totally distant and unapproachable way, of course.
nikui_kuyami on January 31st, 2005 11:10 am (UTC)
That was fun to read. XD
kiraqueen on January 31st, 2005 11:20 am (UTC)
I love that. And (platonically) I love you for posting it!

Seriously, that was one hilarious post. Loveity love love! And I'm not even that much of a Scar fan and you made me squee with that last pic. (Hot...VERY hot.)
Number One Spoon: booty callherongale on January 31st, 2005 02:15 pm (UTC)
I just die whenever I look at that last pic. I collapse and go into serious cardiogenic arrest. It's TOO MUCH.

I'm glad you liked my post. :)
UMEKO danced the CHANSEY Dance!umeko_pyon on January 31st, 2005 11:46 am (UTC)
Emperor Satanis, Defiler of Clergymenrenquestor on January 31st, 2005 11:57 am (UTC)
I must agree Scar is the man. On a lighter note, though, one religiously based, I must admit I don't like the statue of David. We don't know if its correct to what he looked like and it contains one very, I mean, very big flaw. David is a Jew. In the statue he is uncircumsized. To put this in perspective for those of you who don't know much about Judaism...you can't be a Jewish male and not be circumsized. End. Of. Story. Ok, end rant :P

Anyways, Scar is a badass. When I first saw him it was in the 20s or so episodes, after he does the unbelievably cool act of splattering the squishy gray matter of one mass murdering Brigadier General by the name of Basque Gran. When I rewatched the episode (and those previous showing how much of a dick he was to Edward) I applauded or jumped for joy seeing the Iron-Blooded alchemist being beaten like a red-headed stepchild (no offense all you red-headed stepchildren out there). Severe pwnage there I'm telling you. Then as the story progressed you learned there was so much more to Scar's killing spree. I mean, how would you feel if most of your race was wiped out. Of course I also love the twist that two of our favorite and lovable characters (Armstrong and Mustang) are mass murderers, but that's another story.
Anyways, what I'm trying to say is in my opinion Scar is one of the coolest, most dynamic characters of the entire series. You see what a man who has been deprived of everything, including his name, is willing to do for what he feels is right. When I go for beer later this week, I'm raising a pint of either Community Dark or Upland Wheat to my favorite badass from FMA, Scar.
(no subject) - herongale on January 31st, 2005 02:18 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - renquestor on January 31st, 2005 06:10 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - herongale on January 31st, 2005 10:52 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - renquestor on February 1st, 2005 09:33 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - herongale on January 31st, 2005 02:16 pm (UTC) (Expand)
Spike!!: Create.suedeheadspike on January 31st, 2005 12:09 pm (UTC)
Scar = hot.

Really though. I even think his name (or lack thereof) is hot too.

__kat__: chibi clap__kat__ on January 31st, 2005 12:11 pm (UTC)
Your post cracks me up. And I must agree. Scar is non-jailbait sexy hobo! (ooh someone make a colorbar for that! Please?)

umeko_python: Holy crap! I scrolled down and about fell out of my chair laughing. Much love to the giant text!
UMEKO danced the CHANSEY Dance!umeko_pyon on January 31st, 2005 12:21 pm (UTC)

(no subject) - __kat__ on January 31st, 2005 12:45 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - gozumie on January 31st, 2005 12:57 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - herongale on January 31st, 2005 02:19 pm (UTC) (Expand)
__kat____kat__ on January 31st, 2005 01:21 pm (UTC)
Here's an icon dedicated to the sexiness of Scar!

take it and spread the joy!

Scar is sexy!hobo love!
Number One Spoon: shifty!herongale on January 31st, 2005 02:20 pm (UTC)
Wow. I mean, WOW. I lovelovelovelovelove it. Now I just need to figure out how to save icons as non-bitmap files. :) I will so totally use this.
(no subject) - herongale on January 31st, 2005 03:05 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - __kat__ on January 31st, 2005 05:06 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - herongale on January 31st, 2005 05:09 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - forever_alone on January 31st, 2005 02:56 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - umeko_pyon on March 6th, 2005 06:27 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - herongale on March 6th, 2005 07:04 pm (UTC) (Expand)