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14 November 2004 @ 05:27 am
i bring crack fic-age! AGAIN!  
okies
i blame this on ayuamarca
why do i blame them?
because they told me to write a crack fic instead of going to sleep! XDDD

so here it is


heres some fair warning!
this fic is created from lack of sleep and lack of caffiene
its a Ed x Alexander the dog fic and is also m-preg!
FEAR IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!


now... onto the crack:

one day Edo was walking threw the desert
"i hate deserts" he said outloud to himself "their so full of sand... itd be better if they where full of potatoes..."
the for some reason an image of gluttony crossed his mind... why this is.... because gluttony reminds the writer of potatoes
so anyways
edo-kun is walking through the desert going on about how he hates sand and so forth

after awhile of walking he came across an oasis
and he was like "yay!!!!!!!!!! water!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
and he ran towards it, flailing his arms around shouting "water" over and over again
as he got closer, he started to walk slower and more sneaky
much like that of a ninja
for he was actually a ninja
but thats beyond the point

but there where alot of palm trees there and he was like "OH NOES!! PALM TREES!!!"
so he ninja'd up to the water
and he leaned over to drink from it...
and...
out of nowhere...
ALEXANDER THE DOG APPEARED!!!
and he was like "woof? butt in the air = free hump-fest"
so he ran up and started humping Edo-kun
and Edo was like "OMG!WTFBBQPOATOTOES?!"
and alexander kept going at it
for he was a very horny dog
even though ed try to get him off.....

anyways! back on with the fic! since i dont want to write some kind of weird sex scene with the 2...

after a few months... Ed noticed he started to gain some weight...
and he was like "what the fuck?"
until one day he looked as big as a zepplin (did i spell that right?)
and people kept staring at him and he over heared some of the wishpers "who knocked that poor girl up" and such
and he got annoyed when people mistook him for a girl
he couldnt help that he was so damn pretty

this went on until one day he had sharp pains
and after being rushed to a doctor....
he had a baby
yes... he had a baby
how this happened?
i blame it on his pretty-ness

so he had a baby
and it was pretty cute
she had gold eyes and light brown hair
but she also had puppy ears and a tail

Al just stared at it for awhile before going completly ga-ga over her over all cuteness

Ed decided to name her...um... ZOE!!!

and they all lived happily ever after

until Gluttony decided to eat Alexander...

the end!


i go off to get some sleep now
 
 
Current Mood: sillysilly
Current Music: Shining Collection- Nittle Grasper (Gravitation)
 
 
(Deleted comment)
Love me like you love the sunfish_twin on November 14th, 2004 09:22 pm (UTC)
*shakes fist in the air* curse you!
i got like... 3 hours of sleep because of you last night


which means time to write another crack fic
Saya Aensland: Say WHAT?saya_aensland on November 14th, 2004 05:52 am (UTC)
....

*looks to a mirror* Listen up, ho. You're not supposed to find the image of a dog humping an underage boy pregnant hot. That's even more wrong than the fic itself. STOP THAT. Asshole.

*looks away from mirror* Zoe sounds much cuter than those ugly pink wrinkly human babies. ^^ *thumbs up*
I can unscrew the stars: Love---bushbaby_samasugarcane_moon on November 14th, 2004 09:58 am (UTC)
I was gonna say, is it wrong that Zoe sounds so cute?
Love me like you love the sunfish_twin on November 14th, 2004 09:23 pm (UTC)
O_o
*dies laughing*


hee hee
now i have to attempt to draw her X3
Absolutely no decorum.niwakaame on November 14th, 2004 12:51 pm (UTC)
. MEANIE. Why couldn't he have a gerbil baby?
Saya Aensland: BWAHAHA!saya_aensland on November 14th, 2004 01:17 pm (UTC)
Gerbils ain't quite big enough to hump him. Unless Ed inserted a cardboard tube in his ass and put the gerbil there.... he'd just need to remember not to put any lit matches at the end of the tube.
Love me like you love the sunfish_twin on November 14th, 2004 09:21 pm (UTC)
you frighten and confuse me with that statement

*glomps, humps leg and then runs off*
Saya Aensland: BWAHAHA!saya_aensland on November 15th, 2004 12:23 am (UTC)
See, there's this urban legend circulating the Internet. A gay couple were playing a sexual game. They inserted a cardboard tue up the other guy's ass and put a gerbil inside so it would go up his ass. But then they couldn't get it out. So the other guy lit a match at the end of the tube in hopes that the gerbil would be attracted to the light. The fire lit some fart gases or something in the other guys intestines, and the gerbil shot out of the tube as ball of fire, slamming the other guy in the middle of the forehead. The guy that had the gerbil up his ass got nasty burns in his rectum.

But like I said, it's an urban legend, not real.
Love me like you love the sunfish_twin on November 15th, 2004 12:29 am (UTC)
O_o;;
*hides behind Niwa*
im scared!!!!
Absolutely no decorum.niwakaame on November 14th, 2004 11:11 pm (UTC)
I'll just resume the general feelings that what you said got me:
OMFGROFLMAOLOLROFLMAOBBQ [<--yes,stranely enough I want barbecue ._.].You pervy,pervy thing xD. Someday the cops will arrest you for traumatizing children so much.

...Or a random Cardcaptor could have tagged along, used the 'small' card on Ed and.[insert smut here]..the end.
Actually, Edo would have been quite happy,captured by Liliputians: 'YeYz! I'm tAll!'
....
I go bye bye now.
Saya Aenslandsaya_aensland on November 15th, 2004 12:52 am (UTC)
Go here for the full story of the reference.

Someday the cops will arrest you for traumatizing children so much.

Ah yes, the day my child prostitution ring comes to daylight shall be a grand day indeed. Not grand in the sense that I'll get lifetime prison sentence, but in the sense that I'll feature on every news channel of the world. It'll be THAT horrific.
Love me like you love the sunfish_twin on November 15th, 2004 12:56 am (UTC)
O_o
can i be part of it? XDD
Saya Aensland: Pedo OTPssaya_aensland on November 15th, 2004 01:03 am (UTC)
Are you under 16 and attractive?

Oh, you meant as a pimp! Sure, just get your own hat and cane. I'm still in the first steps of creation (I'm working on it, really!) and my funds can't afford to buy hats and canes for my employees yet...
Love me like you love the sunfish_twin on November 15th, 2004 01:10 am (UTC)
yes!
i get to be pimp!! (and im 18 and dont find my self as attractive....)

meh
the hat and cane can wait =^-^=
Absolutely no decorum.niwakaame on November 16th, 2004 10:48 pm (UTC)
*read story* Ouch. Ouch, ouch ,ouch. *traumatized* Poor raggot, and poor stupid moron who lights a match so close to a person's butt.

What sort of prostituion :D? 'Willing', more or less, or have you randomly kidnapped children here and there and forced them to work for you? Evil, evil thing.I'll be sure to tape the show, then :D!

Actually, can I butt in it, too?
Saya Aensland: Pedo OTPssaya_aensland on November 17th, 2004 04:18 am (UTC)
*read story* Ouch. Ouch, ouch ,ouch. *traumatized* Poor raggot, and poor stupid moron who lights a match so close to a person's butt.

Don't worry, the story's not even real.

What sort of prostituion :D? 'Willing', more or less, or have you randomly kidnapped children here and there and forced them to work for you?

A little from column A, a little from column B. The ones over 13 will probably come willingly, to get sex. I bet I can get some trailer trash to sell theirs, and with the quality of parenting these days, it should be easy to kidnap quite a few...

Actually, can I butt in it, too?

You'll have to get your own pimp hat and pimp cane, my start funds funds aren't very stellar...

Unless you're under 18 and attractive. You could be our first bitch. We'd get a veritable boost to our funds... You'd get upgraded to pimp once you turn 18.
Love me like you love the sunfish_twin on November 14th, 2004 09:21 pm (UTC)
wait until next fic *acts like a ninja*
[Z]: unf unfzyraxus on November 16th, 2004 02:04 am (UTC)
Zoe? Hur hur hur.

You're going to hell. D:
Love me like you love the sunfish_twin on November 16th, 2004 03:13 pm (UTC)
*whistles innocently*


*pokes Eds butt* ^O^-